Hi everyone and welcome to Bristol Grandparents Support Group blog. Although we are Bristol based we have grandparents from all over the UK and beyond as members.

It is estimated that over one million children in the UK are denied contact with their grandparents due to family breakdown which may have been caused by divorce/separation, alcohol/drug dependency,domestic violence,bereavement or family feud.
Every child has the right to have contact with their grandparents
if they wish and unless proven unsafe for them to do so. To deny contact from a parent or grandparent has to become as socially unacceptable as drink driving.
I hope to keep you up to date with what is going on in BGSG and I shall continue to campaign for the rights of children to have a loving and meaningful relationship with both parents and their extended family. So please join in as good to hear your views, not just mine!
I also will support via Skype.
There is no membership fee to be part of Bristol Grandparents Support Group.
Esther Rantzen says, " To every grandparent, links of love can never be broken in our hearts."

Please contact during office hours.

Thursday, 19 June 2014

Revenge is never sweet.

When we find ourselves in a situation where we have been hurt so dramatically by being denied contact from our grandchildren, it can become so all encompassing that we think revenge is the answer, taken over by the red mist affect.
Everyone deals with this in different ways.
Many people think that Karma will prevail, that you get back what you give out and that can be interpreted to mean that bad things will happen to the perpetrators, is that what we really want?
Here is a scenario to think about.
If it is your daughter/son who has chosen to deny you contact and you hear that they have become ill or are in trouble in some way, what would you do?
As  Mum or Dad will you ignore them, cast them aside, give them no help in other words allow their bad Karma.
Does that make us happy, to think of them suffering?
Or do we do what parents do, love them unconditionally, forgive but not forget the hurt they have caused, support and help them during their tough time?
It may well be that after their crisis, we find ourselves back where we were, with conflict rising its ugly head again, but you did the right thing, you did what being a parent is all about, we can not be responsible for other peoples actions and behaviours but we can be responsible for our own.


1 comment:

  1. Jane, my Son had a serious drama a couple of months ago I heard it from my niece who then gave me his new number, I contacted him and we were in contact via text until the drama was over and now we are back to the same old but the one glimmer of hope is for the 1st time in 2 years the cheque I sent for my granddaughters birthday which came soon afterwards was cashed and I got a thank you text, I am only hoping that they let her have the card and told her about the cheque, I have to live in hope, I have all the other cards still sealed that have been returned and thought I would put them in a memory box but I don't know if that is right or wrong at the moment