Writing this blog and the FB groups brings with it a responsibility and I don't always get it right, for which I apologies.
I use these pages for keeping people up to date with what is going on, and for offering a place where people can share their stories, feelings and to hopefully get support.
There is one big problem with communicating this way, very often I write quickly, I write from the heart and I make spelling mistakes, and grammatical errors, but one thing that can happen is that the written word is misunderstood.
When you face someone we all pick up on how a person is really feeling and by watching facial expression and body language we can actually 'speak' to one another without the use of words.
Recently when inviting thoughts and opinions on a subject, it was misunderstood, completely.
The result can be of some of us being left saddened and hurt.
I know that what ever I do I can not possibly please everyone.
The trouble with a situation like this is the ripple effect on others.
BGSG is a support group, a group of people to support one another, to boost each other on those particularly bad days, a safe place. It can't be a place where a difference of opinion upsets others.
So yet another note to self, re-read and re-read before writing anything.
One of my aims is not to be someone who is just at the end of the phone or computer, to give a 'stick a plaster on the wound,' reaction to a grandparent who needs support, but to be someone who is there for as long as it takes to walk along side them on this difficult journey.
I want to be someone who recognises that every person is unique, although it is estimated that a million grandparents suffer being apart from their grandchildren, it is not helpful to say things like, "Oh yes I have heard it all before,"the truth is that every individual family has their own loss.
We will often say ourselves, or it will be said to us, " you need to get back to how things were before," it isn't a case of moving on or returning to normal.
Things will never be normal or back to how they were, but we learn to live differently and to except what has happened and for it to be part of our life.
Life throws numerous experiences at us on a daily basis, some good some heartbreaking but they all make us what we are today.
So I would just ask please that anyone reading these posts, that I want to get it right but sometimes I falter.